Articles Vol3 Iss5

EDITORIAL

Hi All,

I would like to wish everybody a very Happy Christmas and would like to
thank all the girls who attended, The Christmas Dinner and discos at the
last meeting, thank you for coming.

Now another issue is here and I'm still here trying to put something
together for you. It is very difficult to find things to put in our
magazine, which is relevant to the Cameo group, but I do my best. My
postbag was bursting with zero letters this month, as usual.

I still have not got a job and the situation at home is getting
desperate. I have decided to try and get a job as Sophie, I thought at
first his might be easier for me but it does not seem to be so!

Our venue situation is still quite bad but I hope it will improve in New
Year, God willing.

We had a bit of a fright the other day when Jessica was rushed into
hospital, but luckily she is OK and now is well on the road recovery, (see her page).

If you have any comments on the magazine or its lack of content please
let me know, or even better send me something that I might be able to
put in a magazine. Please do write to me, it will be nice to receive
something, I have included my postal address at the bottom of the page
so you can send me something by snail mail if you like.

By for now and Love to you all,

Sophie

Some words from Millie

Danielle very kindly sent me this piece, she said I can use it for our
magazine, as it was written by Millie are Chairlady, the comments by Ed,
are Danielle's a longer version, I believe has been published in
The Beaumont Society Magazine.

Millie offers a close TG friend two weeks at her Costa Del Sol domain -
but would that friend arrive safely after her first ever en femme
flight? Would she be apprehensive about her reception by the local
Iberian populace? And can the 'Mustard Tin' take the pace on the Autovia
340?

Millie reveals all following an Iberian Touchdown

Living life as a full time trannie certainly provides some strange and
unusual (not to mention exciting and nerve-wracking) experiences that
frequently depart radically from the conventional norm. I include
this ... waiting in a crowded noisy Spanish airport terminal
(Malaga International) for a long-time friend to emerge through the
blank-eyed automatic doors from Customs and Immigration.

Visualise the scene if you will? I'm wearing a light floral brief mini
dress with shoestring straps which prohibit the wearing of a bra (that
doesn't seem to stop most other girls these days -Ed) and am surrounded
by a milling, impatient throng. I was anxiously wondering how my friend
had stood up to her first flight en famine, this being her first
overseas holiday as an officially registered girl (everything but her
birth certificate, anyway). I assure you from personal experience that
keeping one's feminine cool and aplomb when crushed tightly in a
300-seat airborne sardine can for three hours or so is not recommended
for the faint hearted, and especially not for those perhaps not as yet
fully established in their feminine persona. This is playing life for
real! There's no possibility of retreat to a safe place if you think
you've been read. You can't spend the whole flight in the tiny loo!
Come what may you are committed to the journey! And you'll have to read
elsewhere of the clash between my corset and airport security machines!

As it happened I need not have worried. My friend is a practical and
accomplished trannie and quite soon emerged from the baggage reclaim,
calmly pushing her loaded chrome trolley as though she'd done it many
times before!

It's standard practice here in Spain for girls and women, and opposite
genders, to greet one another with a kiss on either cheek (even male to
male sometimes). But my friend and I (hetero and English) made do with
cool nods of greeting! In the ten years we have known each other our
physical contact has not exceeded a brief handshake.
We were soon heading for the car park.

I don't know if it's my laid-back lifestyle or living frequently within
the Spanish 'mania culture but I have developed a consequential lack of
pace. This means however brief I think I am parking at Gatwick, for
example, it's always takes longer than it seems, and it costs an
extortionate £2 or more! Malaga is much more modest -my hour's tyre
space cost less than 60p, just a small handful of peseta coins. "Flight
OK?" I asked, in a flood of ebullient conversation, as we navigated the
laden baggage trolley past the line of coaches patiently w iting for
their next load of tourists. In the car park we passed rows of Porsches,
BMW's and the occasional Roller to reach my yellow beat-up old Renault
4, fondly known as the 'Mustard Tin'! "Yes, a good flight," my friend
replied. "But the standard of food they dish up as an in-flight meal
-well, even my dog Sally would turn up her nose at that airborne garbage
-and she's not picky
grub-wise!"

I nodded knowingly. "I had a friend who, in bored desperation, actually
ate one once! That's how I got to know the way to the gastro-enteritis
ward at the Royal Bournemouth; I visited him a day or two later!"
(Having spent two days in the Costa Del Sol's Fuengirola h ospital with
the same problem back in June, I can assure you Spanish hospital food is
even worse, although the rest of the treatment was fantastic -Ed).

Spanish motorways, where they exist, are good. The highway engineers sit
down, draw a straight line from A to B, and no matter what's in the way
mountains, valleys, rivers, buildings even -they just build the road with the
necessary tunnels, cuttings and bridges. In no time we were thundering
along the Autovia, admiring all these civil engineering feats at
breath-taking speeds. My friend clutched firmly at the handholds-both
sets of knuckles quite white -staring fixedly out of the fly-
strewn windscreen. Well, you try being rational in a R4with balding
tyres and limited braking in unforgiving (= quite mad) Spanish traffic
with a myopic trannie driver in high heels! It's about20m from the
irport to our village villa, set 1500 ft above sea level in the
foot hills, the last 7 miles being a steep uphill slog off the Autovia.
During this ride my friend expressed her concern about acceptance by the
village populous. Did they know I was a trannie? Would she be accepted
as a real girl or (as a friend of mine) would she be thought of as
another TV? Even if I was accepted, would she, as a stranger and unknown
individual, still be reviewed with suspicion -and shunned?

Glancing at my friend (a very quick look, given the R4'stricky steering)
I could see she was worried. She was going to be two weeks at our house
in a secluded white Spanish hill village, far from the concrete
coastline paradise and the millions of visitors that is the Costa Del
Sol in summer. Heaving theR4'sdash mounted gear lever into 3rd(where it
would remain for rest of the perilous uphill series of never-ending S
bends) I attempted to reassure her.
Yes, the 1000 or so people (and probably the 200 dogs, mules, donkeys
and goats) knew I was a trannie or a transsexual. Having owned our house
for over 25 years now, my change from male to female was well known, and
on the whole accepted. In the main the village women were most
sympathetic, with only the occasional detrimental sniffy nose or stern
look from those who purported to be the pillars of the 14C Catholic Church.
Indeed one morning whilst waiting for fresh hot breakfast trolls in the
bakery, the Mayor's wife asked had I had 'The Op' She'd seen the whole gory
thing on the tele a week previously. "No", I confided. "I'm too old".
She'd patted my arm sympathetically. "My 11th child born last year",
she said". ..and must be my last, the doctor has told me.. .as I'm now
54!". I returned the sympathy. Isn't village country life great!

All my friend's fears prove dumfounded, because not once in a fortnight
was she greeted or treated as anything other than a real girl.
Restaurants, beaches, shopping ... we indulged in them all, completely
enfemme the whole time, and all went totally without a hitch. We were
just two girls out and about.

Even a day out by bus -I refuse to drive into the congested and frantic
city centre of Malaga -to see the tourist sites, along with a huge
proportion of the rest of the holiday season's madding throng -was
problem free. We lunched at an open air restaurant down a side alley,
mostly known only to the locals,and that dragged on 'till well after 4.OO
pm; my friend enjoyed a big plate of fried squid (and yes, I did tell her
what 'calamares' actually was), washed down with copious quantities of
delicious local wines.

In seemingly short order, two weeks passed, and it was time for my
friend to return to the U.K.. We'd got used to each other's company,
we'd adjusted to each other's ways and little foibles. I admit it -I'd
had the faintest tinge of apprehension that two middle aged biological men
living their lives entirely within the female context might have been a
recipe for emotional disaster. But not so; for us, my fears were unfounded.
Our two sunny Iberian weeks were an unqualified success. And the 'Mustard Tin'
even made it safely back to Malaga to return my friend back to the
International Airport!

Ain't life great when you're a trannie!

Jessica Page

Hi Girls and All
My secretary's report is non-existent this time due to the fact we have
not had a committee meeting since the last issue. This was entirely my
fault as I was rushed into hospital so had to cancel the meeting. We
shall reschedule the meeting for January so if any of you would like to
suggest any thing please let one of us know.

Hospital

My trip to the hospital was actually quite exciting except for the fact
I thought I was dying. As you know I am TS and am registered with the
doctors (and everything else) as female so I was treated as an RG
totally by the hospital staff (fantastic). I was put into the ladies
ward and I must say that all my treatments were really good. Full marks
to the NHS even the food was good. On the night I went into hospital the
nurse had to fill in the forms, but I was out of my tree so they asked
my wife all the questions about me which all went fine until they asked
who was my next of kin. My wife gave her name and the nurse asked what
relationship she was. 'Wife' she said. The nurse sort of jumped back,
looked at me and exclaimed 'WIFE????' and she was quite flustered after
that, poor thing. Later I had to have a chest X ray so the took me into
the room and the radiologists filled in her forms. Name Address DOB etc
went fine. Then she asked me if there was any possibility of me being
pregnant. 'No Chance' I said. She then said 'When did you have your last
period'. I gulped and said 'OOH Quite a while ago.' She answered with
'No. I need to know the approximate date' So I had to tell her but she
did give me the ultimate compliment of saying that she would never had
known.

Facial Hair Removal

A few months ago I tried the Ruby Laser and that was really painful both
physically and cost wise so didn't pursue it. So you may remember in the
last mag I told you that I was going to 'Transgirl' (Emma) to have the
hair removal treatment done with her 'Ellipse Intense Pulsed Light
System. Well, with some trepidation I had the first session done in
September. I thought it was uncomfortable rather than painful. I didn't
expect a miracle and I felt the effect was really good. I had a reddish
face for the next couple of days but I managed to cover that up OK. The
real effect I started to notice was after about 3 weeks and my beard was
not a thick as before. I used to be quite paranoid about my beard (who
of us isn't) and always carried a razor with me(Digressing here. The
best razor I have found is the Mac3 by Gillette. Closest shave ever with
little rash) and would touch up three or four times a day, but I found
now that I can go all day now and not think about it. I had my second
session today so in the next mag I'll tell you how that went. At our
Xmas meal on of the girls asked me if I thought this system would
benefit someone who is just TV (her words). I would say a definite Yes
to that. Any of us who likes to go out dressed needs to feel good about
our appearance and I think that after the hair and body language the
lack of stubble is the next most important thing. It feels nice to be
able to put on minimal foundation and look good. We all spend lots of
money (Let's admit it. A small fortune really)
on our clothes so a small investment in our face is really worth it.

And finally

I would just like to wish a very merry Christmas and happy New Year to
each and every one of you.

With Lots of Love from Jessica

Some Trannie News

Alternative Miss London 2001

www.wayout-publishing.com/aml2001.htm

On the 13th Oct 2001 -Steffans 10th Alternative Miss London
contest was enjoyed by over 400 people at The Way Out Club.

This contest is also dedicated for the second year to the memory of Ron
Storme

On the 13th Oct The Way Out Club experienced possibly the best night of
its history when Steffan and Vicky Lee presented the 10thAlternative
Miss London contest.

7 fab winners were chosen from 33 stunning contestants who worked the
run way first in a "sophisticated" outfits and then again in their "sexy"
outfits and some of them were sssssexy.

Over 400 people were at the club to choose the winner with their cheers
as the judges scores produced three contestants tied with near maximum
points.

The tied winners Priscilla, Gisele and Leah took to the stage again to
whip the audience into a frenzy. There could be only one winner and it
was SO hard to tell from the cheers of the crowd who should receive the
crown. "Sweet fairy" Gisele was eliminated to join the other equal
runners up and finally, after many attempts to differentiate, the the
crowd pushed the decibel rate off the scale in favour of Leah True, the
final winner by a hair.

Poem Corner

If You Stand Very Still

By Patience Strong

If you stand very still in the heart of a wood,
you will hear many wonderful things,
the snap of a twig, the wind in the trees
and the whirr of invisible wings.

If you stand very still in the turmoil of life
and you wait for the voice from within,
You'll be led down the quiet ways
of wisdom and peace,
in a mad world of sorrow and sin.

If you stand very still and hold to your faith,
you will get all the help that you ask,
you will draw from the silence
the things that you need,
hope and courage and strength for your task.

Two short poems from: THE LORD OF THE RINGS

As the film of the book is out today!

1.

The Road goes ever on and on
Down from the door where it began.
Now far ahead the Road has gone,
And I must follow, if I can,
Pursuing it with eager feet,
Until it joins some larger way,
Where many paths and errands meet.
And whither then? I cannot say.

Could this be the road some TGs take: TV TO TS?

2.

Still round the corner there may wait
A new road or a secret gate;
And though I oft have passed them by,
A day will come at last when I
Shall take the hidden paths that run
West of the Moon, East of the Sun.

YUPPIE CHRISTMAS...

'Twas the night before Christmas, and all thru' the condo,
Not a creature was stirring whose car had known Bondo.
The Gucci's were hung by the chimney with care
In hopes that the neighbours would notice them there.
The dependants were nestled, all snug in their beds
While Porsches and charge accounts danced in their heads
And my dove and I, watching T.V. cable stations
Had just settled down to three weeks paid vacation.
When out in the drive there arose such a clamour
My wife lost her place in a story in Glamour.
To the window I had the man run, like a flash
To make sure it was garbage men taking the trash.
But he said, "It's a lawyer, sir, parking his car.
I fear it's a Jetta, and in THIS front yard!
Shall I sound the alarm?" "Yes, don't let him inside!
My ex must want more alimony," I cried.
But though servants locked windows and barred the front door,
Our defence was as loose as a two-dollar whore.
For just as back in the Jacuzzi I stepped,
A soot-suited man from the fireplace lept.
"I flew down the flue," he informed, and I sighed.
"That sure puts a damper on things," I replied
He was dressed in a suit, with three pieces and tie,
But I saw he'd forgotten to zip up his fly.
He had a long nose that resembled a dork,
And his beady eyes begged to be poked with a fork.
With only these words, "You poor Ivy-leagued jerk!
This isn't your day!" he went straight to his work.
Beneath the aluminium tree he did crouch,
And took all of our presents to put in his pouch.
The TV's and stereos, jewellery and clothes,
All went into his Hefty, and then he arose.
He crossed the fireplace, turning his back...
And emptied our stockings out into the sack.
But just as I thought that was all I would lose,
He went to the kitchen and drank all my booze.
Then he dumped all our silverware into the bag,
And added the new VCR to his swag.
Our Waterford crystal, our Tiffany lamps,
My son's Telecaster and thousand-watt amps,
My Princeton diploma was yanked off the wall
And twenty sports jackets from out in the hall.
My antique collection, the wife's diamond rings,
He ransacked the house and took all of our things!
But when he had stacked all the bags by the door,
Well, I brought our my Doberman and said "Listen you boor!
You've invaded our privacy -I know the law!
KILL, Charger, KILL!" But the lawyer guffawed,
And laying a finger aside of his nose
Gave a honk, and blew snot -all over my clothes.
He grabbed a dry breadstick and took my dog's life,
Then ran to the bedroom and ravished my wife!
Now, I really was peeved! "Sir, I'll see you in court!
You can't do such things to collect non-support!"
But he laughed, "Non-support?" as he got off my spouse.
"Tomorrow they're coming to take down your house.
And soon the policemen will drag you away.
Your own Uncle Sam's repossessing today!"
"You mean you aren't my ex-wife's attorney?"
I asked, while he loaded my gold Lamborghini.
He laughed as he dashed away into the night,
And tossed a bottle which broke my porch light.
But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,
"Damn, your wife was awfully tight.

DISCO

Despite our problems with locations for our meetings, the Christmas
dinner and disco was a great success, it was nice to have music provided
by the Sound Wave Discotheque.

I do believe Katie's male doppelganger was involved in this, many thanks
to her or him.

Kay provided some splendid prizes and Jane and her girls provided us
with excellent food at a very good price.

I do think music makes the whole party go with a swing the lights and
music all makes for a good party atmosphere.

But I don 'I think we have quite got the timing right as after the
dinner and prizes we didn't have time to do any dancing, it did seem to
end very early, Jessica and I took some photographs of the Party.
Some general shots are shown on the front page, which I (Sophie) took
and a few individual photos taken by Jessica, are shown on this page,
Sorry about the missing faces not everyone was photographed and apologies
for my photos, Jessica have very kindly lent me one of her digital cameras
and I was so concerned with taking the photos that I forgot to shout,
look around, when I took them.

Thank you, all for coming.

Sophie's Page

AN UNFORTUNATE INCIDENT

I have told this story before verbally to some of the girls but I
thought it and would be worth writing it down nonetheless.

It happened to me earlier this year, I just popped out of my house all
dressed up in smart clothes to go to the off-licence to get something to
drink, for later that evening. On the way back, feeling a bit cold, I
broke into a fast trot, I had shoes with small heels, which caused me to
take small feminine
steps.

I was feeling very good about myself as I wiggled along the road in my
short black skirt. As I trotted along, I heard a man's voice calling to
me from behind, "Slow down, Slow down" he cried, as he caught up to me
he said "Where are you going?" I told him that I was going home, "What
is your name?" he asked, I told him that my name was Sophie. At this point
I was outside my house. He told me that he had had a little too much to drink
and had just been beaten up, at this point I noticed that his hands and
jumper were all splattered in blood. "Can I come in and wash my hands?"
he asked, now I know what you going to say, that my answer should have
been "No you can't, bugger off" but the mad fool that I am I said
"Of course you can"

In he came, Rosemarie was in the kitchen and being the coward that I am,
left her to deal with him. I disappeared for a bit, you see I thought
that as he was drunk, he might become violent if he found out that I was
not female. I reappeared, he asked me where I had disappeared to and
asked me to join them, I reluctantly agreed. We just could not get rid
of him!

After he had had a cup of coffee the conversation inevitably turned to
sex, I think he thought it was his lucky day and he was going to end up
that night having a threesome with us! Well to cut a long story short
we had to come clean and confess the funny thing was that this still
didn't seem to put him off!

In the end we had to drive him back to his house, it was only a little
way away. We were concerned that he will be a problem, as he lives
locally and knows all about us, but I suppose that as he was drunk, he
will probably not remember where our house it. I think
that there must be a moral to this story but I'm not certain what it is!

A SISTER ORGANISATION

I was surfing the net as you do and the usual suggestion was made to see
if the domain name of your choice was available. I entered cameo.org and
off course it was already taken, so I had a look at www.cameo.org and
this is who is there:

The Canadian Association for Mine and Explosive Ordnance
Security (CAMEO Security)

I thought it was a little funny at first but on reading about it, it
looks like a really good charity!

Its primary mission the saving of life and limb from land mine and
unexploded ordnance accidents and it acts to remove existing land mine
hazards in war-torn societies,

SHOPPING EXPEDITIONS

On one of the magazine's I did mention that I might like going shopping
with one of you girls and Paula has very kindly volunteered to wander
around the shops with me. Although Paula dressed the first time we went
out on all other occasions she has not, this cannot be too good for her,
but for me it's been great fun because I can go shopping with a guy and
I get HIM to open doors for me although I still have to constantly
remind HER TO DO IT!

We always meet in the Russell-Cotes Museum in Bournemouth and have some
tea at all very quaint. Them we either go to Boscombe or Bournemouth and
wandering around the shops looking at all the gorgeous clothes in the
shops. Paula often buys skirts and tops and things but I, because of my
condition, can't buy anything because called I'm broke, is it not sad!

At the end of the day we walk back to my car and I drive her back to the
station where we say goodbye, is all very nice.